FIVE CAN'T-MISS ZINGERS TO USE AT YOUR NEXT PTA MEETING, CATEGORIZED BY WHICH TEACHER IS HOSTING

  1. if math teacher is hosting — "Wait we still don't have new math textbooks?? Solve for X-CUSE me?!" (pause for laughter, wink at Principal)
  2. if phys-ed teacher is hosting — "If it were up to me, I'd be testing the kids for performance enhancing HUGS!" (pause for laughter, wink at Principal)
  3. if biology teacher is hosting — *looking at Petri dish* "…STILL more culture than the talent show had last year!" (pause for laughter, wink at Principal)
  4. if music teacher is hosting — "If that student's singing was any sharper, it wouldn't be allowed past TSA at the airport!" (pause for laughter, wink at Principal, mention that we should never forget 9/11 (but don't wink after that part))
  5. if art teacher is hosting — "They cut funding for art AGAIN?? Yeesh, even Van Gogh got to at least keep ONE ear!" (pause for laughter, wink at Principal)