HUMANS 2

Boners, algebra, AK's and Beelzebub.
  1. Math
    Born in the ancient Middle East I don't think there is a field of study that is more hated by middle school students and more responsible for radically shaping our society. Math fuels Wall Street, research labs, governments and our tentative steps into the solar system. From your accountant to Neil DeGrasse Tyson math is the one global language we can all communicate in. Forget counting to ten the global network of computers just need 1's and 0's. If aliens contact us? It'll be in Math.
  2. Sex
    Proof positive we could put Real Housewives on Animal Planet? Just how much time we spend thinking/talking/doing the sex. This isn't just about procreation, now way man. We've turned this into such a complicated all encompassing dance that it's impossible to know all the moves or when exactly to use them. How much fear/joy/shame/nervousness/anxiety/ecstasy is caught up in this deed? It's used as such a barometer for our communal status. You filthy Monkeys you're thinking about it right now.
  3. "isms"
    We love labels. We love to identify with a codified way of thinking. Communism, Capitalism, liberalism and conservatism are all clearly defined ways of thinking with their own rules that people love to align themselves with. It helps put the world into neat and tidy boxes. All are deficient in some manner none are perfect but it doesn't stop the blind faith many show in their chosen "ism". Truly our "isms" are our new religions as the battles between are no less fanatical.
  4. Science
    We haven't always loved science. In fact science only really caught on when capitalistic systems discovered their ability to make money from scientific advancements. The science we have today isn't based on some altruistic desire to further human knowledge and improve our species (some exceptions I know) It's "we will win wars, make more money if our science is better. Here is $$$ Gary, go find out how to improve the human genome to make small dicks and A cups a thing of the past".
  5. Guns
    FUCKING GUNS MAN! Wooooo! I'm blasting the crap outta all this shit!!! Man we love them. Chinese invent gunpowder, what do they use it for? Fireworks. For like 500 + years it was for fun not feuds. Never dawned on them to blast the fuck out of their rivals until cannons become cool in the 15th century. Since then, bigger better faster deadlier guns are where it's at for armies and nut jobs who think they need an AR-15 to go to Wal-Mart to protect themselves from the terrorists.
  6. Empathy
    Is such a powerful force in our own psyche. The things we accomplish with it. We can cure diseases, move mountains, give orphaned children a loving home. What is more surprising is just how judicious we are with it. We could extend this powerful human trait to everything, literally everything. But we don't. Why? Empathy is at odds with our primal survival instinct of "me first". We can think our way into empathy, but it prevents us from putting ourselves first. This is a great battle to fight.
  7. Preferred Ignorance
    So many times we turn away from facts and reason because it puts us at odds with our current ways of thinking. We justify our actions everyday by putting things in mental boxes, we "frame" arguments and ideas. That frame, becomes our truth. When a new idea challenges and disproves that old way of thinking, instead of adapting we almost always rebel, hold fast to the old way of thinking and ostracize the people who presented it. We'd rather be dumb then have to change how we've framed the world.
  8. Soul
    We have chicken soup for it, we have aunts praying for it. The self, separate from our physical body. The idea of your eternal self. Sounds pretty great right? But wait your soul is forever in jeopardy while we exist on this mortal plane. In jeopardy from being corrupted by EVIL. The soul is paramount to all afterlife based religions. Be good, live on in bliss. Be bad? Burn forever in eternal pain. Is this just an ancient way of trying to explain self awareness? Consciousness?
  9. The Devil
    My take? The devil as it is known in folklore and mythology represents the ego in ourselves. It's that part of us that chooses self over empathy. Now you follow that devil you may end up with all the riches in the world but at what cost? Internally you'll know you're an asshole. Everyone else will know you are a selfish asshole, and you'll die an empty cold awful human being. All by servicing nothing but our biggest devil on our shoulder. Our Ego.