- •"Guacamole is extra"We've all had a taco before champ, we get it. I'm going full baller here and bustin' out the 2 quarters to make this happen. That's how flush I am bitches.
- •How a seatbelt worksThanks flight attendants, wasn't sure how to put these two do-hickeys together.... And wait??? Uh-oh I can't get out of my seat?!! How do I???? Ohhhhhh....... Cheers thanks guys! Now should I help someone else before putting on my own oxygen mask??
- •"I'm just running 10 minutes late"See you in 20 mins complete with a bullshit story about not being able to find parking.
- •"Sorry I must have missed your text"Uh-huh.
- •Brunch plans this weekendOh my goodness really? You don't say. The fact that you're between the ages of 23 and 32 and that we're subjected to a weekly instagram of Hollandaise sauce and kale smoothies accompanied with selfies with your besties?
- •CatsYou like them. We know Internet. We know.
- •"Would you like fries with that?"It's 1 am and I'm in the back of a taxi rolling through your drive through. What do you think pal? I'm not really making great life choices even being here. Hook me up buddy.
- •"I'm not mad"Suuuuure.
- •"I'm fine'No you aren't, that's why I'm asking.Suggested by @gilbaron