What would you do?

Not referring to the hidden camera, moral dilemma show.
  1. Two situations are currently weighing on me and I'm not sure how to handle either. Perhaps you can help.
  2. 1. I recently found out that a friend of mine is racist. I'm disgusted by the things she told me and no longer want to be friends with her.
  3. She lives out of state so the couple times a year she comes to town and wants to have lunch, I think I'll just be busy.
    I already told her how unacceptable, wrong, etc. I find her views to be. This is a person with some serious issues outside of the racism.
  4. The main issue, though, is that we share a group of friends. We all live in NY, she moved down south two years ago. But we're all sitting at a table together at our mutual friend's wedding next month. I don't know if/when I should tell my friends.
  5. If the roles were reversed, I would want to know. But what if they just shrug it off and keep being friends with her? After all, we've known her for 12/13 years.
  6. My husband says I should wait until after the wedding so as to not make it awkward and I guess I agree, since it's already been a month since this all transpired.
  7. Thoughts?
  8. 2. Is it ok to tell a close friend of almost 7 years that I'm upset I found out about her engagement via social media? Her engagement is clearly not about me but I was very surprised that she didn't at least text me.
  9. I saw her the night I got engaged and never posted anything about my pregnancy on Facebook (meaning I told everyone personally).
    She was at my wedding, attended my son's bris, and took his newborn photos.
  10. We even had lunch less than 2 weeks before she got engaged.
  11. Again, thoughts?