LIST OF PURCHASES THAT PROVE I AM NOT TO BE TRUSTED WITH FINANCES

  1. Living succulent wreath
  2. Toddler turkey costume
  3. Toddler snowball costume
  4. Toddler wig
  5. Monogrammed stocking for my dog
    I already have one. Two. I have to check when I open my...
  6. Christmas ornaments storage container
  7. Monogrammed tote bag for dog
  8. Best friend necklaces
    On more than one occasion. For more than one friend.
  9. Raffi's Christmas album
    Purchased in June. More Jesus than I was hoping for
  10. An app to help a person train for a triathlon
  11. Etsy handmade banner that reads "FUCK THE PATRIARCHY"