1. 1 cup of trust issues
  2. 2 cups of pettiness
  3. 15 gallons of self-esteem issues
  4. 7 cups of various mental illnesses
  5. Most people would choose to put a cup of personal relationships in their recipe, but I've substituted that for a cup of being a rage-filled little bitch
  6. A gallon of love for animals
  7. A pinch of social incompetence
  8. Another pinch of just general incompetence
  9. Mix all that shit up
  10. Awkwardly bake it for 21 years at 420 degrees