TINDER (/BUMBLE) DEALBREAKERS, PART 3

  1. Why so serious?
    If you're not smiling in at least one photo, you either take yourself too seriously, or you're an unhappy person.
  2. You're sticking out your tongue.
    It's neither cute nor sexy.
  3. You have photos of your kids on there.
    I can't say this enough. What the fuck is wrong with you? Why would you share pix of your children on a public dating app? Aren't you concerned for their safety?
  4. All far away shots.
    Awesome view. Cool that you like waterskiing. Jumping off a cliff into a river is fun! But I can't see if you're even reasonably attractive.
  5. Photos with masks or puffy clothes.
    You're a snowboarder! Awesome. You went skydiving? Neat.
  6. Your bio is a verse from the bible.
    On Tinder???
  7. You said "partner in crime."
    Cliche, much?
  8. You're wearing an NRA shirt.
    And your bio is a rant against Planned Parenthood. These two subjects need not be conflated. But you insist.
  9. One of your photos is from your wedding.
    Seriously.
  10. Every picture is you in a bathing suit.
    Self-esteem issues, perhaps? Sadly, actually not a total dealbreaker.
  11. Your brother is scary.
    Thanks for clarifying that the big, hairy man with crazy eyes and his beefy arm around you is your little brother.