1. "...will blow your mind"/"mind blowing"
  2. "fail"
  3. "...will restore your faith in humanity"
  4. "...is everything"
  5. "...broke the internet"
  6. "You won't believe what this [noun] had to say!"
  7. "[prime number] things/signs/times/[noun] that you [slightly relatable situation]
  8. "We [did something useless] and here's what happened."
  9. I'm just kidding. I love all these phrases and use them daily. 😂