Imaginary Clickbait Titles That Would Be Just Weird Enough to Pique My Interest
You like how I used "pique" correctly in a sentence, don't you? Don't worry — that will be our little secret. *touches hand*
- •The Scottish Air Force got drunk and threw this grade-schooler over a fence. Here's how she got her revenge.
- •When you see what these former child stars look like now, you'll set fire to a church and fight the policeDo I get to pick the church?
- •This soldier hijacked an Iraqi jet ski to attend his girlfriend's senior prom, and you won't believe the bullshit song they danced to
- •Elderly people in your area are outraged by Obama's new country music album and you'll never guess why
- •A hungry porcupine put all his eggs in one basket and this is exactly why everyone tells you not to do that
- •You'll never believe the revealing lobster costume this woman fit into after having twelve children in a row
- •What your choice of single-malt scotch says about your insecurities as a man and how to up the ante with negative-one-malt scotch
- •Roller derby was never more popular than when these plucky ladies invented this two-minute trick
- •Get a ripped six-pack and also grow two extra bones when you're bombarded with these brand-new high-intensity electromagnetic mystery waves
- •These extreme animal pals worked together to escape a zoo, so fuck you San Diego
- •The Taliban stole this face cream from NASA and the U.S. Government is officially losing its shitprobably made of comets amirite
- •Guess which of your friends aced this quiz about what dick tastes like