SOME THINGS I WAS "FAMOUS" FOR AS A KID

  1. Knowing all the lyrics to We Are the World at 4 years old
  2. Getting into Ethical Culture by naming the entire NY Mets infield and their favorite foods and colors
  3. Eating ONLY penne pomodoro and cantaloupe for a 2 week stretch
  4. My impression of Ren saying Stimpy
  5. Defending Michael Jackson on the school bus to a middle school basketball game until I cried and on the 9th grade Italy trip until I shoved Jaclyn Rothenberg
  6. Raising my hand and saying "7 Dorfs!!" at an interactive version of Snow White
  7. Pitching to my then boyfriend Zach Kurtin with the bases loaded and a full count in Little League and him taking a called ball for a walk to win the game.
    His mom apologized to me after and said he should've swung
  8. Being able to name my entire 4th grade class alphabetically by first name
    Still can
  9. Telling my sister to "shut the fuck up" at Temple in 2nd grade and then washing my own mouth out with soap when we got home
  10. Knowing all the lyrics to Shoop and teaching all my friends on the school bus
  11. Getting slapped in the face by my sister in front of Woody Allen
  12. My impression of a dinosaur from the 1st Jurassic Park movie
  13. Winning every "who is paler" contest even against babies
    *still undefeated
  14. My tiny bladder*
    *still famous for this one