THINGS THAT MAY KILL ME IN TEXAS

  1. These bites
    Mosquito? Chigger? I got them thru jeans!
  2. The heat and humidity
    Cleav sweat for days. Why am I in jeans??
  3. The thunder & lightning storms
    Shout out to Transpo Joan for saving our lives
  4. My pimple
    The shame of it. It got its own director's chair but was still embarrassing.
  5. The fatty brisket at Smitty's
    Which now my hair smells like
  6. Salmonella cucumber outbreak
    Yes I am losing my mind but someone died in TX! This is what I get for trying to be healthy and eating that stupid Greek salad.
  7. The lack of Riggins