The last few months have been extremely trying. I've felt very beat up and drained by those I've chosen to surround myself with. What I've realized is that despite exhausted efforts some people will not respect you enough to honor your boundaries. Here are the harsh truths that important to me.
  1. Ask me once if I'm okay.
    If I say I'm fine, believe me. I'll talk about it when I'm ready. Asking me repeatedly isn't going to make me want to share - it's just going to cause me to shut you out. Respect my boundaries.
  2. I heard you the first time.
    I'm not into reliving the past, but if we've had the same conversation repeatedly for months, how you act and what you said will be ingrained into my mind.
  3. Please listen to me.
    If I say to stop or drop something. There's probably a reason. There's a difference between telling a joke once at my expense, and berating me with it repeatedly.
  4. There is always a lasting impact.
    You're past behavior and treatment of something can ruin it for the future. What should be good news, can very quickly become something that I no longer want to share with you.
  5. Timing is everything.
    Good news is only as well timed, as bad news is ill. Be patient with me.
  6. Self criticism is the harshest.
    Say it clear, say it once. I can guarantee I'm already beating myself up over it. Speak with love, you don't need to drive it into my skull.
  7. Don't deny it.
    If you said it repeatedly, then you know you've said it. We can move forward faster if we stop pretending.
  8. I will make mistakes.
    I'm not perfect. I'm not easy to deal with, but I certainly care for you. If I've hurt you, tell me. I want to respect your harsh truths so you can respect mine.