Stuff My Wife Says, vol.ii

She's the best. You can find vol.I here Stuff My Wife Says. 📁
  1. Plug me better this time.
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  2. I may or may not have worn this shirt because I knew it would match the napkins.
  3. I'm not kidding you, this place just saved our marriage.
    At a wine bar that happened to have the football game on.
  4. She's got a dodger tattoo, shit just went downhill real quick. Are you writing that down, we're gonna go full list tonight!
    She's becoming self-aware. #Skynet
  5. I'm afraid to do drugs so I'm just going to become an alcoholic.
    My response: pretty sure you just misquoted Dali.
  6. Ray Liota looks like shit sometimes but then other times you're like "oh hey, that's Ray Liota 😍"
  7. I think I'd be so much more affective as an old guy. I say all the same shit.
  8. I'm going to cause an accident so I can get Courtney Cox's contact info.
  9. You're so handsome with those giant boobs behind you.