Middle school survival guide

Here are all the things I wish I had known that would've made middle school much easier.
  1. The cool kids are idiots
    Sixth grade blew because I spent way too much time trying to make friends with the cool kids. I sat with them every day at lunch, but I could never connect with them. Why? Because my IQ was above a 40. Also this caused me to lose my elementary school friends.
  2. Observe try hards.*
    Elementary schoolers have their own version of try hards, called teachers pets, but not all people who were teachers pets become try hards. A try hard has a receding hairline, walks slowly in the hallway, has a very soft voice, and always smiles when people are talking to them. Try hards can be used to see if you did well on a test, what page of the textbook the answers are on, whether or not a class sucks, whether or not you need braces, and whether or not you're being a dick.
  3. Befriend smart people
    Smart people are NOT try hards. Smart people may have receding hairlines, like shit, have perfect teeth, know everything, and be assholes, but there's a difference between the two: Smart people walk too fast for you to catch up to them in the halls. Talk to them in class and befriend them, so you don't have to do anything on any assignment. This is very important.
  4. The textbook and the Internet
    Go through your text books and see if there is a page with all of the answers for homework. If there isn't,use wolfram alpha for math, Quora for science, and For English, just use google
  5. Bring Index cards to class.
    You make a lot of flash cards, bring them to class so you eon't spend 500 hours working on them.
  6. Do homework in class.
    Only under a calm teacher, though. Those who call on people randomly and have annoying voices usually will throw your papers away. The only exception being if there's a substitute.
  7. Foot note:
    Observe try hards from at least 15 feet away. Any closer and you can smell the disgusting scent of nothing.