Haikusies: A tribute to beverages and the things that keep them cold [🍹]

One time I confused the plural of haiku, and instead of owning up to my mistake I doubled down and wrote beverage poems. *Please don't count syllables
  1. Orange juice today
    Quenched my morning desires well / Toothpaste almost ruined it
  2. Sweat on my warm brow
    Frosted mug chills only my hand / No ice, soda still flat
  3. Beer is good in mugs
    Beer is good in cans and bottles / Beer ruins relationships
  4. Hammocks sway in breezes
    The bucket of ice still fresh / Too poor for drinks
  5. I am a grownup
    I am refined and polished / I don't like red wine
  6. Red and blue on wheels
    Hours in ice confirms your name / Can't find the right can
  7. Proper English drink
    Little cups and soaking bags / Tea is better iced
  8. Poverty in college
    Cheap, light, canned beer abound / Bottles were delicacies
  9. Hard work pays off
    Gatorade hydrates winners / Losers drink it too
  10. Essence of moisture;
    Swimable, drinkable / Main ingredient in pee
  11. KOOL-AID KOOL-AID
    KOOL-AID KOOL-AID KOOL-AID KOOL-AID / KOOL-AID, it's like crack
  12. Two parts Kahlua
    A couple more parts vodka / Cream. The dude abides
  13. Who loves orange soda?
    Kel loves orange soda, he does / He does, he duh-uz
  14. Googled it thrice
    Keep forgetting its definition / Horchata, what're you?
  15. Natty Lite, Natty Ice
    Same price same taste, yes / Ice gets you more drunk
  16. Here try this drink
    It's exotic you'll love it / Saki? Nope it's gross
  17. Magnets and good grades
    The inside full of snacks, treats / Milk is past its prime
  18. You can shake it or
    Make it Strawberry; chocolate. / Can't drink in one hour
  19. Save your cup and money
    Free refills don't stop when you leave / Beat the system
  20. I need it now, fast
    Water please, cold, warm, who cares / Ate spicy food
  21. Football game in hours
    Time to pregame, tailgate. Who / will carry the cooler?
  22. I'm picking it out
    For you. Not an ordinary one. / Steve Martin's thermos
  23. This is a nice trip
    Cancun is great this time of year / but, drank the water
  24. What a cruel trick
    I wanted a Hawaiian Punch / not a deep bruise
  25. This is an old joke
    But with Kool-Aid Man around / protect your walls
  26. Freshly mowed lawn
    On a hot summer's day. Mom, / lemonade please!
  27. Coffee is the worst, maybe
    Mix it with chocolate? / Call it mocha (iced)!
  28. I like the color
    Will the electrolytes help / me not suck at sports?
  29. Decisions are hard
    Life or death, cherry or Coke / Might as well mix it
  30. Where are you from?
    Probably not from around here / it's called "pop" not soda
  31. Twisted ankle or
    Savior in a school lunch bag / Ice pack, multi-purpose
  32. You want a slurpie?
    No, I'm not into slurpies. / Slushies are where it's at
  33. I'd like a Coke please
    Will Pepsi be ok, sir? / Don't ask, just bring it.
  34. Not always stocked
    But always ready to be / Fridge, you're my best friend
  35. You can call it soda
    You can call it pop / Not everything is Coke
  36. Everything is fine
    Suddenly the lights go out / Quick, the milk's in danger!
  37. I'm quite grown up bow
    I've moved past my childish ways / Bottles and not cans
  38. Ice can be cubed
    It can even be crushed / But it can't be hot
  39. Thank you for asking
    I'll have what she is having / No, too expensive
  40. A white wine please
    That will be eight dollars sir / This isn't first class
  41. This isn't quite right
    I still like it, but this 'shake / is just melted ice cream