1. Don't change for anyone. Relationships will come and go, and when they go, you'll have to be around the "you" they leave behind. It's better if you still like him.
  2. Despite what anyone tells you, high school will not and should not be the best years of your life.
  3. Don't be scared that I've found a way to communicate with you from the future.
  4. You're right. You won't need all that math.
  5. Stop playing football now. It turns out concussions are waaaaay less funny than you think.
  6. Don't worry. You'll never have to pay for porn.
  7. That typewriter you're using does not make you look cool. It makes you look like a douchebag. And not the kind that gets to be ignorantly happy, hanging out with models.
  8. Go to Nashville and find a tall, nerdy but pretty girl named Taylor. Become her best friend. Trust me it will pay off.
  9. They actually do make more Arrested Development, so get excited!
  10. Oh boy. I can already tell you're getting too excited. Dial it back by half. It's not bad, but it's not great. It's alright. A solid B.
  11. Don't call girls "crazy" because they dump you or send mixed signals. They're trying their best just like you. Plus being a girl seems a lot harder than you can imagine.
  12. Calm down.
  13. Worry less.
  14. Try to have more fun.
  15. And for the love of God stop wearing cargo shorts.