Things I do that my boyfriend hates

Inspired by @bsizzle33
  1. Sit on him
    Why sit on the couch when I can sit on him?
  2. My gremlin noise
    I like to get up really close and pretend I'm going to kiss him only to switch it with this weird gremlin noise that's growly and scratchy
  3. Joke about him sending dick pics
    He would never and I don't want them but it's fun to make him uncomfortable
  4. Jab and poke him instead of tickling
    Way more fun
  5. Lick him
  6. Incessantly ask him questions
    Would you still love me if I turned into a dog? How many tacos is too many tacos? What happens if I put my tongue on this frozen pole, would it be like "A Christmas Story"?
  7. Regularly declare that "I'm hungry"
    Every. Five. Minutes