1. Drink lots of water.
    This means taking convenient bathroom breaks when something needs to be done.
  2. Take bathroom breaks.
    If I haven't been drinking enough water, I'll just sit on the floor.
  3. Go to the water cooler
    Add coughing for a sense of urgency.
  4. Send a fax to a bogus number.
    What takes longer than sending a fax? Sending the same one over and over again.
  5. Turn down the thermostat.
    I hate being cold. Good thing I always have a sweater in my car. Which is parked "very far away."
  6. Leave
    When all else fails, just go.