PEOPLE OR ANIMALS OR INANIMATE OBJECTS I'D RATHER SEE TAKE A STAB AT THE PRESIDENCY OVER TRUMP

  1. That asshole on the bus that always sits on the outside seat with his backpack in the other seat in hopes of not having to sit next to anyone
  2. My next door neighbor's kid who was able to own a dog for less than 8 months
  3. That bitch mom from Breaking Bad
  4. That bitch kid from Walking Dead
  5. Really any asshole character that emanates from an AMC Original Drama
  6. The woman at a bar that said she'd "Fuck me in my pussy" if I lost to her in a game of pool
    Which was extra scary because I'm really bad at pool. Fortunately she was drunk enough that I could cheat and put balls in the pocket with my hand when she wasn't looking.
  7. Trump's Toupee
  8. Kate Upton's bust
  9. Kate Upton's mole
  10. Tom Petty
  11. Danny Glover
  12. A halfbreed from south Jersey
  13. A chocolate chip waffle
  14. My first pube
  15. Whoever made the Muffins YouTube video sensation in 2007
    We were really bad at YouTube in 2007
  16. Literally any Tolkien character that's never had dealings with the Dark Lord
  17. Someone with 1 or more "funny" bumper stickers on their car
  18. The trombone player that got knocked over in Cal v. Stanford 1982