Issues on Which I Will Choose for Whom to Vote

Inspired by @jimlampley
  1. Tax relief to America's most oppressed class, the humble tech billionaire.
  2. Willingness to phase out our organic military assets in favor of logical, unemotional machines.
  3. Ending the foolish 36-hour waiting period for doomsday weapons.
  4. Eradication of homelessness, or, failing that, the homeless.
  5. Ending immigration restrictions on scientists and engineers kidnapped from developing countries.
  6. 5-step plan to get rid of Sergey. Permanently. Because fuck that guy.