What I'm Buying for My Kids on Black Friday

What can I say? I'm a sucker for a good deal.
  1. Black Turtlenecks
    A budding tech genius can never have too many black turtlenecks.
  2. Starter Yacht
    Every kid should have a yacht. I'm getting Inspiration and Steve Jr a 60 footer to practice on.
  3. Bezos owes me a favor, so I can scoop it up for cheap.
  4. A $30 donation to OXFAM
    God, Inspiration is such a disappointment.
  5. The Oakland Raiders
    Steve Jr loves pirates and football, so I figured I'd buy him an NFL franchise of his very own.