1. Earnest female protagonist.
    She might seem a little uptight, but don't worry: sometimes she wears quirky hats, because she knows how to have fun.
  2. Squad of betches.
    An exclusive squad of some kind, ideally with a HBIC (who must always be blonde). They make it very clear that earnest main girl will never be on their level.
  3. Older female with a lesbian-y vibe.
    She doesn't have time for your bullshit. Everyone knows she runs things.
  4. Hot gay love interest.
    Sometimes paired with a wimpy gay counterpart, but mostly there as eye candy for the gay viewers.
  5. Hot jocky guy who is good friends with gay kid (and probably banging HBIC).
    Because that's how the world usually works.
  6. Squad of vaguely evil twinks.
    The more hot white twinky guys with slicked back hair, the better. Not always gay, but always there to sneer when needed.
  7. DILF
    Always paternal. Looks out for earnest main character.
  8. And lastly:
  9. Character relationships that change drastically episode-by-episode depending on what will create the most drama.
    The #1 most important.