HOW I KNOW I'M OLD NOW

  1. I don't "do" crossfit
    Lifting heavy junk in a warehouse sounds like a job I don't have or want
  2. I don't get the beard thing
    Congrats on growing facial hair like every 16 year old, but not knowing how to shave it like every 19 year old
  3. I don't like craft beer
    Stop treating beer like wine. Just shut up.
  4. I call people.