Things to do while waiting for an endoscopy.
- •Ask all adults in waiting area if they also swallowed a small amphibian.
- •Began to wretch and make choking noises, look up and say: just kidding.
- •Get a straw, lay on floor, look around and say: "might as well do it myself", aim for throat.
- •Get a hold of tv remote and continuously flip through channels, on loud, make sure not to stop until people in room are squirming and sighing.
- •Mutter under your breath over and over "all those reports on Dr. ... Can't be true.
- •When finally called, look back tearful and say:"pray for me".