Things That Would Increase The Chances Of Me Watching Sportsball
Which right now are about 1/10000000000etcetc
- •If commentators were visiting female comedians.The list I'd tune in for SO LONG. Amy Schumer, the 4 above, any lady who has ever been on SNL, Maria Bamford, on and on.
- •If instead of stats, mentions of specific players were followed up by very personal anecdotes about them.Childhood stories! Hot gossip! Their favorite snacks to shovel mindlessly down their gullets during a Netflix binge! Make them relatable!!!
- •Every game getting its own halftime show, of some kind.I might watch golf if Key & Peele performed new sketches every long-ass time the players walked to find their balls or whatever happens in golf tv.
- •Being offered plentiful free food and alcoholic beverages.This has actually worked. Super Bowl parties have excellent snackage.
- •If the sports were being played by likeable actors, wearing mics so that we could keep up with the dialogue.I want to hear all the sick burns! The double-crossed best friendships! The forbidden love! Give me Romeo and Julien on the soccer field! Preferably with musical numbers. Then I'll be as invested as these two ^^^
- •And of course:
- •BeyoncéSee? She's doing the sports! Freestyle!