THINGS MY INNER-CHILD'S FANTASY DREAM HOUSE INCLUDES
- •Trampoline floors.Duh.
- •A soda fountain.Not, like, a soda fountain. But a fountain. With soda.
- •Doors disguised as bookcases.Like, everywhere.
- •An underground garage from which I can leave the premises Batman-style.
- •A smart doorbell that does the scary "dun-dun-duuuuunnnnnn" music when any authority figure (like a parent) arrives.
- •Firemen pole.
- •A huge crazy twisty tube slide that goes outside then back inside and lands in a ball pit.
- •A Wonkavator.
- •Vending machines filled with candy and chips and such that never run out and don't require money.