⭐️ THINGS MY GREAT AUNT VIRG HAS SAID
My great aunt lives in Hawaii and we visited her a few years back. We made a list of the excellent old people humor/advice she gave us and this is the perfect place to share it. Here are some of the gems.
- •I don't drink anymore, but I don't drink any less either
- •I just realized you're not just sitting next to me, you're driving!
- •As you mature you will realize what you once did all night will take you all night to do
- •Waitress: "Your food is coming soon." Virg: "Yeah, so is christmas."Our breakfast took almost an hour and she was getting fed up with the wait. Note: it was also July.
- •My mom: "You should get a walker." Virg: "Well I can't marry him. I don't want a piece of furniture I want a man!"And then not long after...
- •My mom: "There might be some nice gentlemen friends in the retirement home." Virg: "Been there done that!"
- •Do you need gas? Well I can give you some.Farts audibly
- •Gotta keep up my reputation!Farts again the next night
- •Hey wanna race?To another old lady in a wheelchair at the pineapple plantation
- •My name is Virginia, virgin for short but not for long.Dirty old lady humor 👌🏻
- •My mom: "Don't choke we have no firemen to save you." Virg: "There's one coming up on the left, just tell him to rub my chest."
- •My mom: "We all have to go home and shower." Virg: "Hopefully not all at once!"