COMMENTS I STOP MYSELF FROM WRITING ON INSTAGRAM

  1. You seem like a terrible person
  2. Your parents didn't raise you to act this way
  3. Your chronic selfie taking fills me with unspeakable sadness
  4. Please stop posting pictures of your child on the toilet
  5. Just stop it. Stop it now.
  6. You are better than this
  7. I wish I could unfollow you but you are a parent at my kids school and now I feel trapped into liking all of your photos from the Phish concert you went to
  8. Or conversely: I LOVE YOU
  9. I wish we were friends IRL do you want to become friends IRL?
  10. Your life seems amazing
  11. I WANT YOUR DOG GIVE ME YOUR DOG PLEASE CAN I HAVE YOUR DOG