1. "Slow down, James Agee!"
    If somebody is being too nice to @bjnovak (Let Us Now Praise Famous Men, am I right @maisie? A book that both of us have read?)
  2. "I thought I called a carpenter, not Henry James!"
    (Only valid if he keeps wanting to turn screws, like "The Turn Of The Screw.) extra points for ghostly intrigue as joke is said.
  3. Something about "Wardine Be Cry"
    Easily the funniest part to reference from Infinite Jest because it's so small and really show-offy but a rare snide joke at DFW. Say this and everyone will not only assume you read it but read it well and are now calling DFW out for being problematic for one-upping skills.
  4. You can call someone "Dave Keggers" but it's not especially smart or funny
  5. I swear to god the Henry James one was funny when I wrote it.
  6. "Finnegan's baked"
    Only if finnegan is baked, ideally at a wake(?)
  7. These are going downhill fast but I'm having tons of fun right now.
  8. "W.E.B DuBois" is always funny?