THINGS MY KIDS HAVE SAID TO ME

  1. "Not now mister potato head!!"
    He's four and three quarters and didn't want to clean.
  2. "I have an amethyst crystal and I will turn you into flies!"
    A very smart six year old girl told me this in a British angry-play voice.
  3. "Witches aren't real! But maybe tell everyone that witches aren't real so they don't get scared."
    Six year old trying to play it cool.
  4. "I have an enemy. It's Hitler."
    Very intense six year old boy. Future athlete type.
  5. "Lev's a big scary soldier."
    A six year old with Aspergers said this when I sternly had to discipline the class and my heart broke and I laughed and the whole class was so relieved
  6. "You can come to my birthday party if you want"
    Same kid. A real sweetheart.
  7. "If you die can I have your money?"
    Calm down Reva (age 5)
  8. "School was bad. Everyone has a butt but my teacher has a million butts."
    Talia, age 6. Very bright, very specific sense of humor.
  9. "I have to dance!!"
    Rose, age 5, whenever she's happy.
  10. "Kids, right?"
    David, age 8, maturely observing kids freak out about potential cookies