Weird Things My Sister Says

My younger sister is always saying something strange and off-putting. One day I started writing it all down.
  1. You wanna know something weird I learned about bananas?
  2. You made me look like a fool in front of the whole produce section
  3. Arsenic is not that easy to get anymore.
  4. Hummers for everyone!
  5. Mac and cheese is not phallic.
  6. That's the second time someone called me a nazi today. I guess I should reevaluate my life choices.
  7. When I was nine, I did ballet for a year. I regret it to this day.
    She is 25
  8. All my sexual dreams are about turtles
  9. I'm very confused about sperm right now
  10. Sometimes I wish I got hit by a car, just a little bit
  11. Shut up Kelly Kapowski, no one cares that you're poorl
    She gets really worked up over Saved By The Bell
  12. I'm an important artist in this town.