AMAZING THINGS I WITNESSED AT WHOLE FOODS

On this holy day of Zombie Jesus
  1. My cashier was incredibly high
    To be fair, this could be seen any day at Whole Foods
  2. Possible True Love, Cougar Couple
    She was at least 45 and he was ...maybe 30, probably 25. She was trying to push the basket, but he was walking behind her, with his arms around her giving her kisses on her cheeks and saying "let me push the basket!" And they were giggling. I stopped to tell them how cute they were and they were delighted.
  3. Carbon copy couple of my husband and myself
    Seafood Lady asked how many Lbs of shrimp I wanted. I said, "Uh- 5 shrimps x 2 ppl sounds affordable. 10 shrimps please. Poor person in denial style." This girl with purple hair laughed and struck up a conversation with me & we immediately learned we both have so many elements of Awesomeness in common. It became uncanny. ...I should have gotten her number, but as an adult, I am weary of making new friends.
  4. 5 avocados for $5 - 2 boxes of strawberries for $3