SEXIEST BOOZE, RANKED

Classic Drinks Only
  1. 1.
    Martini
    It's dirty. It's extra dirty. It's automatically bond-associated.
  2. 2.
    Red Wine
    Glass shaped like a curvaceous lady's bottom. Makes you relaxed and loopy in a dreamy way.
  3. 3.
    French 75
    The fancy, foreign version of a 69.
  4. 4.
    Old Fashioned
    The missionary of drinks; yet it can still be made SO. RIGHT.
  5. 5.
    Side Car
    Sounds like the equivalent to a reach-around.
  6. 6.
    Daiquiri
    The early 2000s Britney Spears, spring break loving, Becky drink. You know you're gonna get the grief of a headache afterward, but you have it anyway bc it's there. It's always there.
  7. 7.
    Margarita
    The OG of the bar. Comes in many forms but always gets the job done.
  8. 8.
    Cosmopolitan
    The redundant vapid sex shoveling magazine can be thanked for this inclusion.
  9. 9.
    Sex on the Beach
    Obligatory addition - should be Least Sexy Drink (who wants beach things in their crevices?)