FUN THINGS TO DO NOW SPRING IS HERE!

  1. Stab two Mr Softee ice cream cones onto your chest
    AKA the Madonna Gaultier corset AKA the 50s Housewife
  2. Develop sexy new allergies!
    Air! Grass! Sun! You should probably just be put in a box in the attic with the Christmas decorations for safekeeping!
  3. Fuck a bee!!
    Oh heck, fuck TEN bees!!!!
  4. Pastels!!!!!
    Pastel dress! Pastel shoes! Pastel hair! Pastel lips! Pastel skin!!! pAStel bLoOD!!!!! PAaaAStel mEMories!!! PaSTEL FOREVER YOU PieCeOFSHiT
  5. Find new places to sweat from!
    Fingertips?? Scalp?!??? Eyeballs???!!?
  6. Dionysian orgy with your fellow Maenads
    Wear naught but animal skins! Drink the milk and honey which springs from the ground beneath your feet! Just fuckin rip a man to shreds with your bare hands if he tries to join!