TERRIBLE WAYS TO PITCH YOUR DARK, GRITTY REBOOT

  1. Walk in and point a gun in the face of the only female executive
    Just to be honest about how women will be treated in your vision for "Felix the Cat"
  2. Use the phrase, "Like THE GOONIES, but with more rape"
  3. "We open on Teddy Ruxpin, lighting a cigarette. 'It's always raining somewhere in Rillonia,' he growls. His face is just....covered in blood."
  4. TIM BURTON WOULD LIKE TO INVITE YOU ON A STRANGE JOURNEY INTO THE TWISTED WORLD...OF SNAGGLEPUSS
    We will need $56 million dollars to CGI Johnny Depp into a mincing puma.
  5. "This isn't your average damsel-in-distress...she doesn't need a Prince Charming to come to HER rescue!"
    Real talk: this phrase has been used to describe literally every single female genre protagonist since 1992.
  6. Throw sand in everyone's eyes
    Getting "griteral" about "gritty reboots"