Things That Cause You to Murmur "This World Is Fucked".

  1. Bad facelifts on actresses I love.
  2. That picture of a dead polar bear because of shrinking ice on NatGeo Instagram.
  3. When people don't use their turn signals.
  4. My Serbian truck driver next door neighbor who blasts the worst EDM music at 2am.
  5. When my local Whole Foods doesn't carry my salami, so I have to travel to a different Whole Foods.
  6. Everything Whoopie Goldberg has said in the last 6 months.
  7. Anyone who would vote for Trump.
  8. Oh yeah, the Syrian refugee crisis, Middle East wars, the AIDS epidemic in Africa and millions of girls being denied education throughout the world.