A compilation made of my own and the internet's misheard lyrics
  1. Swim in a deep sea of bacon
    From @john wettest song "Your Body is a Wonderland." This one came out of me, many years ago when I was still a freshman in the English language. The lyric goes "Swim in a deep sea of blankets." I think it's justifiable to interchange the last word do fit the mood you're in, amirite?
  2. Standing on Obama's porch, you told me that you'd wait forever...
    From Bryan Adams "Summer of '69" this gem belongs to my boyfriend who does not and will not sing it in the correct form. "Standing on your mama's porch, you told me that you'd wait forever"
  3. Hold me closer Tony Danza...
    You can't blame Phoebe Buffay for longing to tightly hug the boss man. From Elton John's "Tiny Dancer"
  4. Hit me with your pet shark..
    Because your best shot is not good enough. From queen of 80's hair Pat Benatar "Hit me your best shot"
  5. I don't think you're ready for spaghetti..
    Destiny's Child most famous song turned awesome because spaghetti is always more delicious than jelly. From Bootylicious "I don't think you ready for this jelly"
  6. In New York, concrete jungle wet dream tomatoes, there nothing you can't do..."
    This is the brainchild of my friend Sue Ammons. I loved it so much that for years I hash-tagged all my New York IG pictures with #WetDreamTomatoes /From Alicia Keys "Empire State of Mind"
  7. Shamu, the mysterious whale.
    I am amused! From U2's "Mysterious Ways" - She moves in mysterious ways
  8. You've got a death wish/ Soup and Salad bar.
    You've got a death wish/ Suicide Blonde (Suicide Blonde - INXS). Trust me, once you hear it, YOU CAN'T UNHEAR IT!
  9. Everybody in the club gettin' titties.
    (J-Kwon) "Everybody in the club gettin' tipsy". - Close enough.
  10. Let's pee in the corner, let's pee in the spotlight...
    Typical bipolar Pedamundo behavior right here. "That's me in the corner, that's me in the spotlight..." REM's Losing My Religion