OVERWHELMING EVIDENCE THAT THIS IS NOT MY SEAT ON THIS AIRCRAFT

Or I'm just living a very elaborate illusion!
  1. The amount of space I have.
    I'm a small person so I usually have a fine amount of space on planes, but I can completely stretch my legs flat and have my bag in front of me. TF
  2. The cushiness of these seats.
    It's like real cushions, not the uncomfortable leather shit.
  3. I was just offered a tray of champagne.
    No WAY is this offered to the peasant class people now too!
  4. I was given a paper menu of the plane food.
    Starter: potato salad with wasabi mayo and prawns. Main: seared fillet of British beef with artichoke truffle risotto, people sprouting broccoli, baby onions and roasted garlic jus. Dessert: chocolate and salted caramel pot (???)
  5. I was offered a choice of 2 complimentary paper newspapers.
    I'm not even mad about how much extra my bag cost to check anymore.
  6. They came around with hot towels before our dinner was served.
    Last I checked they only did this at sit down sushi restaurants!