1. My last ten google searches have been fantasy vacation planning, graduate programs and/or job listings for work I may or may not be qualified for.
  2. I am eating something with frosting on it and there is not a celebration happening.
  3. I have ordered a Malibu and Diet Coke at a bar
    My husband has been instructed that this is the sign that I need to be cut off. It's what I drank in college and if I get drunk now as an adult my inner 19 year old starts ordering for me.
  4. I snap at you when you offer reasonable help.
  5. My nails look like a bird of prey has been gnawing on them.