Ways To Add Excitement To Your Life!

  1. Open a restaurant that serves "Buckshot Burritos"
    A Buckshot Burrito is any burrito that is fired out of a t-shirt cannon at the customer.
  2. Go to any animal shelter & get into a heated conversation with an animal.
    Be sure to pause to allow the animal to provide a rebuttal. Topics of conversation: literature, physics, history, Real Housewives, & politics.
  3. Try & crash as many High school graduating class yearbook photos as you can.
    Sobriety not required.
  4. Use online dating sites to start a cult or gang.
    Core philosophy of said group also not required. Bonus if you should up & pretend to be one of the people that also got duped. Extra bonus if you only use Christian Mingle.
  5. Hang out around a yoga studio all day. Tell people that you work for Buzzfeed & that you are doing a listicle of auto fellatio tips.
    Worst case scenario: people will think you are a freak. Best case scenario: you change your life.
  6. Watch a NASCAR race using 360 VR technology.
    Spend hours in your own home spinning around in circles.
  7. Have a hibachi party for your pets.
  8. Start a retirement community fight club.
  9. Put on a blindfold & go for a walk while drinking an entire bottle of hard alcohol.
    Ignore your cellphone until you regain consciousness after blacking out. Document where & when you wake up.
  10. Dress up as a clown & spend all day riding public transportation.
  11. Stare at people all the time.
  12. Perform marriage ceremonies at the DMV.
  13. Start a Dead or Alive cover band & see what bathroom you are already to use in North Carolina.
    Odds are none.