How to piss me off.
- •Cat call me.I'll probably respond as if I were a teacher scolding a child for peeing on the swings, "That is inappropriate and unacceptable." Yeah. 10 year old you is scared shitless right now.
- •Be the auto-correct on my phone that kept changing the word, "shitless" to "shirtless".You know what I meant, phone. Let's be adults here.
- •Remind me that because I am younger than you, I am inferior to you.It's funny how quickly a wonderful conversation about the world can turn into a "life lesson". I'm twenty two, thank you for telling me that I'm too young to do whatever it is we were previously chatting about.
- •Be whatever item I cannot find but desperately need at that moment.Keys, phone, debit card, ID, medication, horse tranquilizers etc.
- •Demand respect FROM me whilst being disrespectful TO me.You will not get it.
- •Insult anyone I deeply care for.You're going to get a talking to!
- •Touch my hair without asking.Yes, it's naturally curly. Yes, it's real. I promise I'm not lying. No need to test my honesty.
- •Ask me if I'm married.I have no problem with marriage. I have no objection to someday getting married. I'm am however in a committed relationship with a fantastic gent, and when I respond to your advances with "I have a boyfriend." And you respond back, "Ah, you're still single." Expect to get the exact opposite of your preferred outcome.
- •Be the driver that is horribly inconveniencing me by doing absolutely nothing wrong.I apologize in advance.