THINGS MY DOG DID ON THE TRAIN RIDE BACK TO NYC
Shit got so real
- •Met the conductor and engineer, both of whom loved him.
- •Took a nap.
- •Woke up and suddenly had a monstrous allergic reaction to I DON'T KNOW WHAT. Oh God, what is happening?!
- •Threw up into my scarf.
- •Threw up into my coat.
- •Threw up into a plastic bag that took way too long for me to find.
- •Horrified all the passengers, who were kind and offered nervous support from a safe distance.
- •Took another nap (oh God, is he breathing? Is his throat closing??).
- •Reminded me to talk to my doctor about that Xanax prescription.
- •Spoiler alert: he's gone from Swamp Thing to Two-Face (translation: he's fine). I have lost five years off my life, no doubt.