HOW TO GET THE MOST OUT OF THE TRUE DETECTIVE SEASON 2 PREMIERE (SPOILER-FREE!)

Last night I watched the premiere of the new season of That Show They Keep Advertising Before Game Of Thrones. Here's a non-spoiling list of what I wish I'd known (and done) ahead of time
  1. Watch (or re-watch) the first season
    As far as we know, the plots of the two seasons are completely unrelated. However, the way in which the show tells its story can be incredibly confusing, and this season assumes that the viewer is already familiar with the show's style. Season 1 is much friendlier to first-time viewers (as would be expected) and an all-around excellent season of television, so it's worth the weeklong binge. Bonus points if you start speaking in philosophical paradoxes and learn to crush a 6-pack in a sitting.
  2. "A clue!"
    I haven't had this much fun watching a show since LOST because, once again, I have no idea what's going on. Get ready to obsess over tiny details that may or may not point to story threads that's may or may not ever get resolved.
  3. Grab a friend
    I chose 2: @originalamericantreat and my roommate, Tommy. The more people you can rope into watching with you, the better, because they will catch the tiny details you miss and vice versa. But make sure you choose quiet friends because no matter what, you're going to have to...
  4. Turn the volume all the way up
    There's a lot of mumbling in this show
  5. Turn off the AC/traffic/noisy roommate
    LOTS of mumbling in this show
  6. Consider turning on subtitles
    Jesus, can't HBO afford a speech coach?
  7. Don't watch on an Xbox
    I don't know if people have the same issue with HBO GO on Roku or Apple TV, but for some reason all of HBO's shows are SUPER quiet when I watch them on the Xbox 360. Even with the volume all the way up we were huddled around the TV straining to figure out what the fuck each scene was about.
  8. Assign someone to the pause button (this person will also be responsible for hitting rewind)
    Confusing plotline + Who-level volume (Where's Horton when you need him?) = lots of backtracking.
  9. Pro-tip: Use a player that has a 10-second Rewind button.
    Because you can only watch Colin Farrell drink the same glass of whiskey so many times.
  10. Tell me what you thought!
    I'm probably going to be posting about this a lot because it's that kind of show. So let me know what you think of the show so far!
  11. Watch Ballers afterward as a palate cleanser
    And then write a list about that viewing experience
    Suggested by   @originalamericantrt