LOOKING FOR LAST MINUTE DATE TO A FRIEND'S BIRTHDAY WEEKEND IN PALM SPRINGS

Please call me if:
  1. 1.
    You are looking to fall in love for 48 hours
    MAYBE MORE
  2. 2.
    You think I will enjoy your company
  3. 3.
    You are funny
  4. 4.
    You ARE a mammal
  5. 5.
    You want to role play the LA Mad Men episode from season 1
    The one where Don parties in this house. This is honestly the main thing.
  6. 6.
    You want to finish a draft of what I'm working on OR just tell me it's perfect and that I'm a goddess
  7. 7.
    You will say nothing about the lace "coat" I plan on wearing over everything all weekend.
    If I say I'm Jemima Kirke, then I'm Jemima Kirke.
  8. 8.
    You will come home early from the bar with me.
  9. 9.
    You will decide not to go to the bar at all with me
    Is there a bar? I never been to PS before. Can you believe it?
  10. 10.
    You REALLY swear you are a mammal and not an amphibian or reptile
    Or a dinosaur (and don't mean slang for old. Old is fine. T-Rex is not fine)
  11. 11.
    You wanta be taken care of?
    I can do stuff too
  12. 12.
    You wanta speed all the way there like Ryan Gosling in Drive.
    But no killing anyone by stepping on their head in an elevator! Promise?
  13. 13.
    You are good at snacks, just in general.
  14. 14.
    Lmk
  15. 15.
    PS: how long do apples stay good for? This is just regarding the only apple in my home and whether or not I can eat it.