Reasons I Would Be A Terrible Girlfriend

I assume that any guys (and, let's be honest, probably all you lovely ladies too) that read a single list of mine are going to fall in love with me. I get it, I'm fantastic. But, honestly, I would be a terrible girlfriend. Here are just some of the reasons.
  1. I'm self centered.
    Okay, that's a little harsh. I care about every person I know (and, honestly, every one I don't too) and lose sleep over every problem in the world. But at the same time, I care about myself way more than I care about other people in my life. Maybe the ranking is: strangers I don't know with big problems, myself, people I'm actually supposed to care about.
  2. I'm really bad at commitment.
    Okay, I mean, I'm not going to be out there cheating on you or anything. But I don't like commitment, in any area of my life. I almost had a heart attack when I signed up for the 18-month membership at my gym. I'm not good at decisions, so sticking with one is just the worst. My favorite Instagram comment of all time was when I posted this pic and my old coworker said my fear of commitment was even evident in my nail polish selection(s). 😁
  3. I'm not affectionate.
    This one surprises most people that know me, because I guess I seem like I would be? I don't mind quickly hugging my friends or family (sometimes) or cuddling with cute kiddos, but that's it. I legit shake when they make us hold hands at church. I hate it so much.
  4. I'm not social.
    Again, I think this surprises people because I have a lot of friends and ultimately end up doing a decent amount of socializing. But I really don't like it. I like being at home. Alone.
  5. I think I'm the smartest person in the room.
    I mean, not always. I went to a lecture by Sandra Day O'Connor once, so not then. But 99% of the time, I think I'm the smartest person. Sorry.
  6. I'm usually in my own little world.
    I'm really good at loving other people. I'm really bad at letting them into my life. And evidently I'm not great at engaging. Even when having conversations with other people, I'm usually having one (or more) conversations with myself in my head, so I'm just not the best talker, I guess.
  7. I like to sleep in the middle of my bed.
    And I move all over the place. Basically, there's no room for you. Sorry.
  8. I can be a bit particular about things.
    And God bless anyone that questions my systems. Like obviously when shopping I put the items on the conveyor belt at the checkout in a very specific order (because I'm not an animal) and my family thinks it funny and makes jokes about me being OCD and I hate that.
  9. I roll my eyes. A LOT.
    So, odds are that will be my reaction to anything you say that I dislike. Which will probably be most things you say, because I don't really like talking to people.
  10. I don't answer my phone. And I don't respond to a lot of texts.
    I was on vacation with my parents last week, and I realized they both talk to multiple people on the phone every day. Happily! It gave me anxiety just being near them. I don't enjoy talking on the phone with most people. Just my mom, sometimes my brothers. I'm also apparently very bad at responding to text messages, at least according to a lot of my friends. In my defense, look at how many texts I had Friday when I first checked my phone at 11:45 AM. I can't help it that so many people love me.
  11. I don't particularly like cheese.
    I eat it on certain foods, and typically don't mind mozzarella, but in general, I'm not a fan. I don't think this is a big deal but most other people find it to be a fundamental flaw. 😝
  12. I have bad taste in music and movies.
    And I don't really foresee it getting any better.