Total Bullshit Phrases From Newscasters
- •We are monitoring the situation.You mean following Twitter like the rest of us?
- •Tensions are high. The mood in the city is... The local sentiment.I was married for sixteen years and often couldn't tell what the fuck my wife's mood was. Some 20-year-old fresh out of J school who just happened to be Europass hoping through a news zone when shit went down and called your studio to pitch themselves as a stringer is somehow going to be able to put an emotional thermometer up everyone's ass in the region?
- •Our reporter in the regionI refer you to the previous comment about some punk calling up the news agency trying to sell themselves as a reporter.
- •Breaking news.Breaking news is broken news. A bunch of meat puppets vamping on what is, by definition, the worst data about the event? They are experts on camera-ready makeup. Why not just wait a bit to get better quality info?
- •The news you need to know.You need to know about dangerous weather, traffic issues, and stock market crashes.