Why I'm a Badass

  1. I have never ever poked holes in a potato before baking it.
    Not afraid of exploding potatoes bitch.
  2. Don't use coasters at my house.
    Rings on my coffee table fuck yah
  3. Talk on my phone while pumping gas.
    How many people you know died from talking while pumping?
  4. I do not stretch before working out
    Stretching is bullshit. Ask any certified physiologist. Yoga is fun but also BS.
  5. Water straight out of the faucet
    Suck it Brita
  6. GMO everything
    And vaccinate my kids.
  7. One password for everything.
    If you know the name of my cat you can have all my data.