WAYS I'D RATHER TRAVEL THAN SPIRIT AIRLINES

My recent flight on Spirit included a two hour delay, sitting for four hours with my knees up to my chest and the plane smelling like a dirty diaper. Here's how I would have rather travel than on Spirit
  1. United
  2. Delta
  3. Trail of Tears
  4. Swimming through the sewage system
  5. Underground Railroad
  6. Walking on stilts
  7. Car ride with my mom where we only talk about my sex life
  8. Horse and buggy
  9. Malaysian Airlines
  10. Teleportation when it's still in the testing stage and it's a 50-50 chance only part of my body makes it through