Requested by Heather

Family vacation: cast of characters

  1. My parents.
    They'll spend most of the week arguing about the temp of condo and how many nights my dad will want to go to the Lobster House.
  2. My brother and his wife.
    Attached at the hip. Ah, young love.
  3. Aunt and Uncle 1
    10 mins after getting here he announced their condo's decorations were very ugly and she announced that 20 years of marriage is just too damn long.
  4. Cousins 1 and 2
    One brought a hover board. Deciding if I'm gonna try it. The other's diet consists of cheez-its and chocolate. Both adore Mila.
  5. Aunt and uncle 2
    She loves the sun and he doesn't come to the beach until after 3 pm. Both love vodka.
  6. Uncle 3
    Newly divorced and navigating single dad life. To be fair, she was not a good person and not much help, so it's easier and harder at the same time.
  7. Cousins 3 and 4
    One misses his mom, the other is glad to be rid of the step monster.
  8. Cousin 5 and girlfriend
    Flew in from Dallas so he wouldn't have to miss the trip. Serious dedication! Girlfriend is our resident bartender.
  9. Cousin 6
    Opted to go on vacation with her boyfriend's family last week instead. Seriously regretting it now.
  10. Cousin 7
    Observing and being jealous from Louisiana.
  11. Me and John
    Taking turns chasing after our toddler and trading booze days and driving days. It's all about balance!
  12. Mila
    Living. The. Dream.