Violent Things I Did Today

Some people have stated that all Muslims (1.5 billion of us) are inherently violent. Here is my violent day. (This list is violently passive aggressive , you've been warned )
  1. Violently cracked open eggs for breakfast. And beat them too. Take that eggs.
  2. Violently shook the garbage bag out of the can because seriously it like suctions itself in there , what the heck garbage bag?
  3. Violently tossed the garbage in the dumpster with a sound that's like "oh-WAH" . I have zero upper body strength.
  4. Cuddled up with my toddler to nap hard around noon. It was violently good . I think that counts.
  5. Woke up late and violently cursed when I realized I have 20 mins to get to a 2 pm appt and a toddler in pajamas.
  6. Met my dad for lunch and coffee. Ordered a violently overpriced cookie.
  7. Gave my husband a death glare for his sarcastic reply about how he didn't do something despite having SO much extra time today. We were on the phone but I know he felt it.
  8. Scrubbed a skillet with a degree of violence cuz I burned some pasta sauce at the bottom.
  9. Finally held crow pose in yoga for like 30 seconds. Felt violently awesome. Okay that one doesn't make sense I'm just showing off. 💁🏽
  10. Violently ranted in my head as I cleaned up the house. I was gone one hour, how did my husband and kid manage to create a mess this massive. grrr.
  11. Violently flipped my pillow to the cold side before sleeping ( checking my phone )